As you know, the Dead Milkmen are in the middle of a tour to support our new album, Soul Rotation. We toured about 6 weeks in Europe, then 6 weeks in North America and we have at least 6 more weeks to cover the south U.S. You probably want more tour stories, right? Okay. Let me see.
I tried Crystal Pepsi in Colorado, where it was being test marketed. It sucks. It's Pepsi without the color or caffeine. Who needs it?
In Tempe, I listened as Kim, from the band Billy Goat, alphabetically recited the 50 United States in under 20 seconds! She learned how to do it as a child for some type of song, I believe. (Billy Goat, by the way, are a band from Dallas who toured with us for a good part of July and played hard-edged funk that got the crowds moving.)
I saw a lot of castles in Germany. But the highlight of the tour so far had to have been Vancouver, where after our show I decided to take a walk with a nice young woman through the town's "red light" district to an after-hours club that happened to be only a block from our hotel. Well, it was a fascinating walk, but the club proved too crowded and loud for our mood so we decided instead to grab some pizza and enjoy the night air at the bus stop while waiting for the last bus out of town to the woman's apartment. Who should walk by us not once, not twice, but three times early that morning on one of Vancouver's more bawdy avenues? Yes, indeed, former child TV star and current comic genius, Danny Bonaduce! My young Canadian friend was not so impressed as I was, for she did not grow up watching him every Friday night on The Partridge Family. I didn't attempt to explain to her how influential the Partridges -- particularly Danny -- were on my outlook, my humor, even my choice of career. And there Danny was; in cowboy boots, black jeans, rock 'n' roll style leisure jacket -- he probably had just finished a set of stand-up.
Minutes later, pizza consumed, the bus took my friend away and I walked back to our hotel. While crossing a street, coming toward me, there was Danny again! This time I mustered up the courage to speak: "Hey, Danny, it's cool to see you!"
He smiled and said, these were his exact words, I swear, "Thanks a lot, man!" and kept walking. In fact I think his pace got faster as he disappeared into a world of prostitutes and all-night porn shops.
© 1992 Joe Jack Talcum